I feel amazing! Two hundred times better then I felt before surgery!
I want to clean the house from top to bottom!
I want to finish all the projects that I wasn’t capable of finishing before!
I want to cook amazing meals! (My cooking had deteriorated dramatically – it was horrible!)
I want to hike and skate and play!
And I am EXHAUSTED!
I feel like I should be able to do all of those things and tackle them in one fell swoop as I have not had any post op pain. Yet here I sit at 3am unable to sleep. I just finished my steroid treatments about 36 hours ago and I was hoping my sleep would start back into a regular pattern shortly. Apparently it is going to take longer then I would like.
My days have consisted of waking up in the middle of the night, usually around 2am, lying in the dark for an hour or so before I figure out I am not going to fall back to sleep right now, turning on the light, reading for quite some time and around 5am turning the light off again to rest my brain. Our little people have been waking up around 6 and coming to snuggle with me, they miss our evening snuggles and I am happy to cozy up with them until around 7 or so if they aren’t too restless.
We get up, have breakfast, I like to do school with #2 if I am up for it and the boys get dressed. Somedays I have enough energy to take a shower and change, somedays by 10am I just want to lie quietly on the couch and close my eyes.
#2 had a doctors appointment the other day, so we stopped at Target on the way home – wow – the visual over stimulation. I may not be visiting stores for awhile! I find any sort of fast movement or too much color, pattern, etc to make me very tired and confuse my eyes at the moment. This means that when the children start jumping about, making fast movements with their arms or body parts or any toys it wears me out. Poor kiddos. I feel badly about it.
My mother has been wonderful! I am grateful that she is so spry, capable and willing to help. She takes the children out somewhere everyday so I have time to rest and the boys can get some energy out. She will be here for another week – what will I do without her? What an amazing gift.
River and my mom have been keeping the kitchen clean and the laundry done. It has been so nice to hear them say, your job is to rest and heal right now, as I have been having a little trouble giving myself permission to let go of all the little things that I feel I should be doing.
Our community has been providing food for us everyday and that has been such a blessing. We haven’t had to worry about a meal plan or shopping. Thank you to everyone that has or is planning to contribute to meals – It has definitely aided in my healing process and given myself and the people taking care of me one less thing to worry about on a daily basis.